The erased chalkboard of the rest of my life, a black background and then just swirls of things that have been taken away…
Jo Ann Beard has been the literary darling of essayists ever since her break-through essay The Fourth State of Matter appeared in the New Yorker sixteen years ago. Like me, she’s a small-town baby boomer with an encyclopedic memory for the ordinary. She typically relates her memories with such nuance that each moment of each scene feels like a celluloid frame on the film cutting room floor; every disappointment and surprising grace detailed to such extremes that even a fly on her arm might take on significance. She says as much in the essay NOW, advising This is how you write. You let the writing lead and you simply follow, letting the memories and the images and the language take over. You’re the writer. You get to decide… That’s the beauty of her work and, for me, often the sticking point. Such a stream of consciousness style presents challenges for the ADD brain. I find myself having to reread (or rewind) to see what I missed, but I found this collection of personal essays captivating. Maybe it was the somber tone; I’ve been dealing with some major life disappointments of late, and the title essay is about a clique of mature girlfriends helping one of their own through cancer with one final adventure to India. In Cheri we meet the world’s most sympathetic doctor; his name is Kevorkian. I’m not saying every essay was a win for me, but this book is totally worth your time, whether you’re an aspiring writer or just a mature woman dealing with a knot of baggage. Listen on Audible, 7 ½ hours, fabulously narrated by Suehyla El-Attar. Just bear in mind, this NYT Notable Book of 2021 is heavy stuff.